This is my journey to motherhood. It's a bumpy road, but I'm traveling it whole heartedly.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Vacation Way Too Short
So I got back from our trip to Tampa a little while ago. The house smelled like 'animal', which could only mean the dogs probably crapped and peed in the kitchen and our neighbors just didn't clean it up all the way. There were medical bills piled up on the kitchen table, what else did I expect to see when I got home. We spent way too much money on the trip, but we got some nice clothes. We certainly won't be going anywhere else anytime soon, or even going out to eat again for a very long time. I hate coming back from vacation and having reality slap you in the face as a 'welcome home.' I just want to go anywhere else, but here. I don't want to go to work, I don't want to do chores, I don't want to pay bills, but I have to. I'm starting to get sad again, the only reason why we went on this trip was so I could forget about TTC, which I did. But coming back and having to pay bills and realize how much we actually spent, and that I had wanted to spend that money on maternity clothes or a baby, just makes me sad. I don't know what will happen this month, if I'll even ovulate. I really hope I do. I just want a chance, b/c a 0% chance is too hard to take.
My name is Melissa and I'm 28 years old. I've been married to my husband for six years. We've been together since we were 18. We started TTC in May of 2007. I've been thru 8 rounds of Clomid, 3 IUIs, and IVF#1 which all resulted in BFNs. FET#1 and IVF#2 ended in chemical pregnancies. FET#2 resulted in our little miracle Liam, born 8-17-11. This is now my journey through motherhood and past infertility.