Things have been kind of hard the past few days. Our best "couple" friends had their baby on Monday morning. She got PG the first month off BCPs, didn't have morning sickness, or any other complications during her pregnancy. We went to take care of their dogs on Sunday night at around 11pm then went back to the hospital to wait in the visitor area for a few hours. We took them some food and then went back to our place too sleep. I got up around 8am and went back to the hospital to wait with their families. Rob joined me for a few hours too. Their baby girl was born at 11:30am and weighed 8lb 3oz and is named Cadence (Cadie for short). I had to go to the school for a few hours then I went back to the hospital and finally got the chance to go meet her. I held her for a few moments and it was so surreal. All I kept thinking was am I ever going to get to hold my own child? She was so peaceful; teeny tiny fingernails, beautiful little lips, so innocent. I left the room when they needed to check her over and I haven't spoken to them since. Rob and I have texted them and called to give our congrats and even asked if they needed any help. Our friendship I don't think will ever be the same. They have a new little one to take care of, and all of their plans will be based around her. I certainly can't blame them b/c I know that's exactly what will happen when we have kids, but it's still bittersweet. I am happy for them, but I have to admit, I cried when I got home that day. I cried because I wished with all my heart that it was Rob and I in that hospital room with our baby, not them.
I know we are getting closer, day by day, to our FET, but it's still hard to keep waiting. We have our appt on June 1, it can't get here soon enough.
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Melissa, I know this feeling so well. Our two best couple friends have both had their first babies in the last four months. They both got pregnant while I was doing my IUI's last year, and it kills me to think that the six of us could all have kids right now... I'm so sorry it's been such a tough week, but I really have a great feeling that you and Rob won't be "just a couple" for much longer.
ReplyDeleteHugs.
You're right- you are getting closer day by day.
ReplyDeleteStill, I'm sure it was extremely tough holding a newborn baby when you want one for yourself more than anything in the world. I'm sure your friends appreciated you being there for them.
One day, it will be your turn. And I'm thinking that "one day" is just around the corner.
Holding the baby for the first time is the hardest. That what I found with my nephew. I hope your FET is a success and then your friendship will change again and you'll get to plan play dates!
ReplyDeleteMy appt is June 1st as well. Can't wait!
Hang in there -- it will be your turn one day.
ReplyDeleteIt's so hard to be there for friends as they become parents, I know.. it always feels like you're being left behind, yet again... and the jealousy and envy is so sharp it cuts like a knife.
Praying for you, for your upcoming FET Tuesday, and for a BFP to be the result~
I think you did a really great job in holding and visiting the new baby. I hope that it is our turn soon.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear your sadness as you went to visit your friends and their new baby. I think it took a lot of strength on your part to be supportive and go for the visit, especially since in the past you have said how difficult this has been for you to be around your PG friend. I will be thinking of you on June 1st. (((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jamie- it shows how strong you are to be able to go see the baby. I hope your friend realizes what a good friend she's got in you. One day your friends will be visitng you- I know it!
ReplyDeleteI'm so impressed by how you handled the situation despite how hard it was for you. You are such a good friend to her to go through the pain of seeing the baby, and offering your help if she needs it. It truly shows your character. I'm sure it was extremely hard to take. As time goes on it only gets harder, I'm sure. I know you will hold your own baby one day, I just hope that it's coming up very soon. You've done enough waiting! BTW, I love your new blog layout. It's so cute!
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to hear that you are moving forward with your FET. Best of luck on Tuesday morning U/S!
ReplyDeleteI completely understand the feeling about the friend's baby. I had my first visit with my friend's baby today. I can say that it went better than I thought it would. However, I completely understand how you feel. Big Hugs!
I absolutely know how you're feeling, I feel like I've been there a million times. *big hugs* I'm praying your turn is right around the corner...
ReplyDelete