Out of My Hands

Well the weekend went much better than I expected it to go.  My mom and MIL were very civil to each other.  My family shower was very low-key, we had some good food and good conversation.  I got alot of duplicate things, all of which came from Targe.t or BRU.  I'll discuss what a joy it was returning everything later.  That night the 3 of us went through all of the clothes and sorted things, it was a really nice time, and I'm surprised they did so well.  Now don't get me wrong, I don't think that we'll all be doing holidays together, but it's at least a start. 

Somehow even though people new what we were registered for, I still got tons of duplicate items.  I don't know if it just didn't get taken off my registry or if there is a delay from when the item is bought to when it's off the registry.  All I know is that it was NOT an easy return process at either stores.  Targe.t was the worst by far.  You have to login with your user name and password to get a specific barcode (not just the registry barcode but something different).  This is where the issue first started.  I've been having problems with the online registry site for weeks.  I logged into the kiosk like normal and it said it couldn't find my email.  Then it said my password was incorrect.  The guy helping said well you can use your ID but there's a $70 limit, we probably had well over $300 of returns unfortunately.  I ended up having to get on my phone go to the website reset my password for the 3rd time and hope it worked.  After about 30 minutes it finally did.  We returned the 4 monitors (yes 4 of the same kind) and clothes that we already had, and were luckily able to get enough money to buy our crib, matress, and other necessities.  We then went to BRU and did the same thing.  Returning stuff there was a little bit easier, but of course they gave me issues about not having receipts.  Unfortunately I think this is something people often forget when giving gifts, it helps tremendously if you have them.  My parents were able to pay for the difference on our carseat/stroller, so we got that as well.  We are officially set with pretty much everything we will need!  Now I just have to get the carseat installed by the police/fire dept, wash all the clothes that he might fit in, and pack my bags. 

Well we got another offer on the house, much more reasonable this time.  But of course there's a catch.  The lady wants to build a driveway from the front of our house to the back of the house.  So the sale of the house is contigent on this being possible.  Unfortunately I just don't think there's enough clearance on either side of the house for a driveway.  It would be a really good thing if it worked out especially since she doesn't want to close until late September, but this stupid driveway is probably going to mess up the sale.  Oh well.  2 offers in only a month is really good, but I'm worried that these might be the only ones we get.  The lady had until tomorrow to accept or reject our counter offer and then start the process to get the necessary permits.  I'm hoping that by the end of the week she'll know if putting a driveway in is even possible.  If it isn't then there's no reason to get contractors involved to get estimates and we can go ahead and move on.

So lots going on yet again, but I feel like we're getting closer to a resolution with the house. 

Waiting for the Calm

Things have been crazy again these past few weeks.  I successfully defended my dissertation, so I'm officially Dr. Melissa P., PhD!  It was really really stressful, but I got through it and everything seems to be in order with my paperwork for graduation.  I won't be walking in the ceremony, honestly I just don't want to sit through a 3-5 hour graduation ceremony and plus it costs like $250 to borrow a "robe" for the ceremony, not something I'm really willing to spend money on right now.  I know it's only going to happen once, but there's so many more important things to deal with right now, I'm just letting it go.

Selling a home in this economy is pure HELL!!  Add on being PG during this process and it's a total nightmare.  We've had the house on the market for exactly one month and we've had two couples look at the house 2 times each and then one other couple from out of town come and look at it.  This past Saturday we got our first offer.  I was hoping it would be reasonable, but for some reason the couple who decided to put the offer in thought we were total idiots and gave us an offer of $40,000 LESS than our asking price (which mind you is the price we bought the house for 4 years ago).  We are fully aware that we are not going to make any money off the sale of the house.  At this point all we are trying to do is break even and get enough to cover our mortgage and be able to walk away.  However, we have a limit that if we don't receive an offer for a certain amount the house will go into Short-Sale because we just don't have the extra money lying around to cover the leftover mortgage and the closing costs.  Our realtor evidently didn't understand all of this even though we explained it to her countless times, that we have a certain amount we need to get for the home or it will go into short sale.  We told her what was left on the mortgage so she knew what to expect.  Somehow she wasn't "aware" of how dire the situation was and basically argued with me yesterday that we didn't tell her everything, which is completely absurd.  She also said that we weren't going to get anywhere near asking, which is news to us, since she never told us this either.  At some point if things don't turn around and she realizes she's working for us, not against us, she's going to be fired.  She's the realtor who sold us the house, and we probably should have gotten someone different, but we liked her.  We put in a counter offer last night for under our asking price, but I'm not expecting them to agree to it, especially after their first offer.  Rob is trying to look into getting money out of his retirement, so that we could at least have some "extra" money to put towards the closing, so we can prevent a short-sale.  Honestly the penalties for taking money out early seem to be less than the damage a short-sale will do to our credit.  Basically we wouldn't be able to buy a home or car for at least 5 years, maybe longer if we have to resort to a short-sale. So for now we are just waiting to see what happens.

Everything is still going really well with the pregnancy.  I have had a few episodes of major swelling, but it's mostly I think due to the heat.  One time last weekend we went and saw a movie and during the movie my hands and feet got really swollen.  It scared me bad enough that I went to a pharmacy near by to get my BP checked out.  It was a little higher than normal for me, but still within the normal range.  I'm still getting good movements, mostly in the morning when I'm waking up, when I'm hungry (or he's hungry) and late at night before bed.  He moves here and there during the day too, but not as much as those times.  There have been a few times where he was more active one day and then the next day he wasn't and I got really scared, but I'm just trying to take it day by day at this point.  I go in for my 34-week check tomorrow.  Anxious to see if I'm still measuring ahead like I have been, I'm pretty sure I am just don't know by how much.  Can't believe that in two more weeks I'll get to start going weekly.  I think once that happens I'll be getting more anxious and excited for the delivery.

I have my family baby shower on Saturday and both my parents and MIL and a family friend are coming to spend the night on Saturday.  My parent's and his still don't get along at all, so it will be interesting to see if they can act civil towards one another.  I'm sure I'll have an interesting post about all of that!

Catching My Breath

I know it's been a while since I've posted, much less commented on what's going on in everyone's lives. I've just been so busy this past month, I just didn't make the time to post. I have been reading as much as I can, so I know the jist of what's going on with almost everyone. For the past four weeks I've been doing nothing but working in the lab, coming home and working until well after midnight on my dissertation, and if I find a few hours that I'm not doing either of these things trying to pack, paint, or clean our house so we can put it on the market asap. My dissertation was turned in on Monday, but unfortunately I'm so drained from that whole process I've been coming home from work and just vegging. I'm hoping this weekend to work more on the house. We've got a storage unit, so we're trying to pack up everything that doesn't need to be in the house. I can't believe we're going to be moving soon and that I might have an infant to take care of during a move, WTH was I thinking? Oh yeah, I need a job and I found one, just not one where we are now. Rob's having a hard time finding a transfer job up to ATL, but I'm hopeful that will fall into place when it's supposed to. I don't think I could bear him leaving to go up there to start a job early, while I'm stuck down here trying to sell the house, and go to all of my appts by myself. I know I would get through it, and I have enough of a support system with friends and family here in town that could help me, but I never sleep when he's not by me. Literally I become an insomniac and I become paranoid checking all the locks and doors, crazy I know, but he's my protector and always will be.

We've set a deadline for no later than June 6 to get the house on the market. I really wanted to have it done before then, but with trying to do everything while both of us are working, it's just been impossible. Tack on being pregnant and not being able to lift anything or paint huge rooms, I'm feeling pretty helpless. I have been helping with baseboards and some touch ups here and there, but I've been avoiding painting any of the rooms, I know it isn't completely unsafe, but I'm just being overly cautious at this point.

The baby is doing really really well. I had a scare with my glucose testing and failed my 1-hour test. Let me tell you how much fun that news was, while trying to finish my dissertation. I was a nervous wreck for days after that. Did my 3-hour test and was miserable for about a day afterwards. Luckily I passed all blood draws so who knows why I had the bad results for the 1-hour. I've also been dealing with some anxiety issues again. I'm still seeing a therapist every few weeks just to talk out my fears, but when the baby doesn't kick quite as much, I think the worst and it gets the best of me. My OB is so wonderful and any time I've voiced any kind of anxiety or possible issues, he's never hesitated to do a quick ultrasound to ease my fears.

I had a check up on Tuesday and the baby wasn't moving quite as much, so I told the OB about it. The top of my stomach had been super tight for a few weeks and then within a day or so almost deflated, I told him this and he said well I think everything is fine but lets take a look anyways and measure all your fluids. Of course all was well, and our little guy is topping the scales at almost 3lbs already. He's measuring a full 2 weeks ahead, based on head/belly/leg bones, which is amazing, but also scary since I have another 3 months to go. We had our first 3D u/s last week and it was pure joy, best money spent ever. He seems to be really laid back and chill already and just really didn't want to move unless he was really poked alot. Our nurse let us come back again this week for another look, just because of the way he was positioned and low and behold he has already moved head down! That's why my stomach was feeling deflated for a few days, his big head wasn't poking me in the ribs anymore. The nurses said he probably won't move again because of his weight, but of course it's always a possibility. We go back again on June 14 and then I'll be going bi-weekly. Crazy!!

My first shower is set for June 18 for friends and I'll have a family shower a month later on July 16. We registered this past weekend and that was a blast. I really like the stroller combo we picked and some other little things. I'm bummed that we won't get to set up a nursery until we move to ATL, but it's not as it he'll be sleeping in there for the first few weeks (or months knowing me). My dissertation defense is set for June 20, so I have to start working on that again in another week or so. I'm really nervous about it, but I've come this far, I'm not going to back down now.

And now for your viewing pleasure, Liam Michael (whose named after Rob's dad William and my dad Michael):

ER Visit

Things have been really uneventful as far as my pregnancy goes since we found out we were having a boy, except about a week ago I started getting this weird cervical pain and alot of pressure. It would come and go and I figured maybe it was the baby just being in a weird position. Well on Friday afternoon while sitting at my desk at school I got some extremely intense pelvic pain and some tightening and cramping above my pubic bone on either side. I thought it was probably ligament pain, so I stayed seated but after 15 min it wasn't going away. I took some tyle.nol and waited a little longer before breaking down and calling the OB. Unfortunately b/c it was a Friday and the weekend of Easter, they were closing early and basically told me to go straight to OB triage since the pain wasn't going away. I couldn't believe it. I knew I wasn't having contractions, but the nurse told me if it was "normal" ligament pain it would hurt for a little while but go away relatively quickly. So I dropped everything I was doing, called Rob and made my way to the hospital. I cried the whole way there, but my wonderful friend Carli stayed on the phone with me and made sure I made it there in one piece. Rob luckily had no trouble getting off work, but of course he went to the wrong entrance so I had to wait a little while by myself.

I got to the front desk and broke down just because I was scared, not because of the pain. I mean I knew that if it was something really serious it was way too early for our little guy to survive. This thought alone was enough to make me want to fall to my knees. I filled all my paperwork out with Rob sitting by me. The nurse finally called me back and when she asked my name I couldn't even speak. They made me strip down completely and put on a hospital gown and do a urine test. Honestly at this point I was just thinking, "I haven't shaved in like two weeks, my legs are so hairy right now." I made my way over to the bed they had ready for me and another nurse hooked up a contraction monitor. They took my BP and it was surprisingly normal even though I was so stressed out. One of the nurses found the Hb with a doppler and all was well. The OB finally came in and did a very quick U/S. I couldn't see anything b/c he was standing in front of me, but I caught a few glimses and baby boy is still breeched. Everything still looked fine and he checked for clots or any other abnomalities, but they're weren't any. He then did a cervical check and holy crap that hurt worse than any pain I'd previous felt. I swear he stuck his whole hand up there! My cervix was high and still tightly closed, so no issues there. Basically he thinks I had severe ligament pain and they don't really know what caused it. The nurse thinks maybe I got up too quickly and taught me the proper way of getting up from a chair and from lying down so that I can maybe prevent this from ever happening again.

I know if the OB had been open and it wasn't a holiday weekend I could have gone in without any problems and I wouldn't have even had to go to the ER. But, just being in OB triage, knowing it was way too early to be there, was unbearable. I love this little guy so much already, I just can't imagine losing him after coming this far.

This Easter I'm very thankful and feel very blessed. I am blessed for the family and friends that I have, but above all the opportunity God has given me to be pregnant. I know that I need to cherish each and every day that I have being pregnant. It is truly a gift, one I honestly thought I was never going to experience.

It's A .....

There's no denying it, it's a BOY! Both Rob and I couldn't be happier. I think we both secretly wanted a boy first and in a way I wanted a boy instead of a girl because I worry that any daughters I have will inherit all of my medical issues (hypothyroid and infertility). It was probably the best U/S ever, but I'm sure I'll say that about the next one. He was wiggling and kicking up a storm, but I found out I have an anterior placenta so most movement that I feel is either really low or on the sides not out front. Everything was measuring right on target. His leg/arm bones are measuring over a week and a half ahead and he weighs close to 12oz already. He's going to be big like his dad. For now he's in the breech position, but that could certainly change. We went out and bought a few 3M old clothes instead of newborn b/c in all actuality I think he's going to weight well over 8lbs at birth. I'm just so excited to meet him (but of course not anytime soon!) This past Friday I got an official offer for a post-doc position. I haven't accepted it yet b/c I wanted to wait to hear from at least one other lab, but it looks like it will be my best option. I'm really excited about it and it will mean we will be moving to ATL either before or after he's born. Luckily the Prof didn't have any issues with my needing to take time off and he even said I could wait until November to start. I don't think we'll be able to survive on a single income for that long, but we'll see how things go. My next OB appt is on April 26. Can't believe I'm half-way there. Now I just need to get to viability and I'll breathe a little easier. Grow baby grow!

Frazzled

I know I have been a horrible blogger yet again, but honestly I just haven't had the time nor the energy this past month. The weeks are just flying by partly because of school, but also because I've been going to interviews non-stop. My first interview went well. I really like the Prof, and she seems like someone I could really learn alot from. I of course told her about my PG and it seemed to go over just fine. I won't hear back from her about a decision until after the first week of April, since she has someone else to interview. The second interview was for a Prof at Vanderbilt. I think he is my favorite so far, but unfortunately funding is an issue. Basically he would have to secure funding through the school for me to even be able to come. I've emailed him some more questions, but for now it has to be my last choice. I just went to the second interview at Emory for the neurosurgeon who is rolling in money. This one didn't go very well at all. Not because of something I did, but because of how he acted. Let's see first off he was late to my presentation. He answered his phone 2 times, yes during my presentation. The phone continued to ring and someone finally told him to turn the damn ringer off. I tried to not let it get me flustered, but seriously I thought he could show me just a little bit more respect than that especially since he invited me to come and give a talk. We went to an Irish pub for lunch which was nice, really good food, but we sat outside and super pale me got sunburned. My nose and face are peeling as we speak. He again answered his phone constantly and then left early from the lunch and that was the last I saw of him. One of his post-docs is the one who basically runs the lab and the one I would work more closely with. I liked everyone in the lab, but seriously don't know if I could be under someone who is so scatter-brained and unavailable. Honestly I also think they don't agree with my PG, and really wanted me to be able to start sooner than I could. I don't know if this will cost me a position, but at this point this baby is more important to me. I'll find a job, it's just looks like it's going to take alot longer than I thought. I won't hear his final decision until the end of April, so we'll see what happens.

On the baby front, things are going well. At about 15 weeks my gag-reflex went into overdrive. Anytime I smell anything funky or foul I start gagging and have even thrown up several times b/c of this. I guess it's my pay back for not having M/S! I'm starting to feel tiny flutters and thumps, not very often, but more often each week. My big U/S was supposed to be tomorrow, but it got changed to the 29 because the doctor had a conflict. I'm really bummed about it, but I know I can get through one more week if I keep myself busy with school work, which shouldn't be a problem. We've slowly started buying a few things. I went to a baby consignment sale and found a few gender neutral overalls, two different slings, and some bedding we really like. It's turquoise/brown/cream/white and I think we could girl it up if we need to. They're my favorite colors and the entire set was in amazing condition I just couldn't pass it up. If I end up changing my mind, I'm sure I could sell it and get most of my money back.

I probably won't post again until next Tuesday. Stay tuned for the gender reveal and make your guesses now. I'll post a belly pic next week too. I'm carrying really low if that gives anyone a guess.

Out of the Danger Zone

I'm so sorry I've been MIA again. It's just been crazy busy with school. I had my OB appt yesterday and really love my OB. I got an un-scheduled u/s with the portable machine which was super exciting. Got to see little arms and legs and all the growing bones, including the spine. Couldn't get a good profile shot because the baby was still curled up. But it wiggled and moved all around. I was really nervous about having to get a pap done. I was just freaked about possible cramping and bleeding, and it was totally for nothing. It's not like a regular pap and he was very gentle, hardly felt it. I was a little uncomfortable for a few hours, but so far nothing negative to report. He his referring me to a maternal-fetal specialist for my anatomy scan b/c he's seen evidence of heart defects associated with IVF embryos. Scared me a little to hear that, but I'd rather be on the safe side and catch things early rather than later. The big reveal will be March 22! So I'll get a really long scan then and actually go back for a another a few weeks later to re-check the heart even more. I'll meet with my OB again on March 29 for a check-up too. All in all it was a great experience, other than the fact that I can add another person to my list that has seen my lady bits. There was a med student from the school I'm at doing a rotation, thank goodness it wasn't somebody I taught or new. But seriously I think I've well surpassed the 20 people mark for those that have seen and/or touched the goods. When do I get a prize? Or am I just a slut now? Just kidding :0)


On the post-doc front, I've got 3 seperate interviews lined up. 2 for a school in ATL and 1 for a school in Nashville. I'm really excited but nervous about going and having to do a presentation on my work. They're all paying my way (air travel and hotel) which is amazing, so I'm hoping that's a good sign that they're willing to pay for me to come for a visit. I have one on Feb 28, then next on March 4 and then the last on March 17. Hopefully I'll get an offer from at least 1 of them, but I'd love to have a choice. We've also planned for a vacation to Disney with my parents also in March. I'm really looking forward to some time with Rob to just be away from home for a while. We invited my parents as a surprise for their anniversary this summer, but also because we've done alot with his parents and not much with them recently. Other than all of this, doing well and very happy!